The place that ı feel most comfortable is my hometown ,Van. Van is in east part of TURKEY.It is known as Paris of eastern part of Anatolia in onother way
I calm down and feel better as ı watch Lake Van.The lake Van is the largest one in Turkey and navigable with its depth iz some part reaching 500 mt. When ı plunge into the lakes salt water, it feels me refresh to my skin ad drinking a glass of water on a hot day.
Because of the beatauty of its surronding landscape van has often been called ''Van for this world faith for the next''. Akdamar island, van castle, van cat, Lake Van and some bazaars are several most famous specials.
The Van lake is beautiful blue colour, but unfortunately the salinity of the lake restrains agricultural develpment in the region.However,there are notable production of fruits and vegetables particularly north of the city.Ferryboats above the lake provide the railway connection between Tatvan andVan with Lake's amazing beauty.
Van is my most comfortable place mainly because of sights, sounds and the unique feels of everything mentioned in this essay.When ı'm there ı feel totally relaxed as if ı were in my own little world. Most of all, van is my favorite place to be on the earth
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hi Rızgar :)
YanıtlaSilyour description about Van is good.you explain it very well.but there are some mistakes like ı letter.he must write I.Recep teacher said to me that :) I wonder Van.I want to see Van but it's a long way from my city.And I hope I can see a Van cat in my travel:D
see you ...
Dear Rızgar,
YanıtlaSilyour essay seems interesting and good,but it has some mistakes.
your introduction is really good but I can not say the same thing about your body paragraps.
your thesis statement is about the importance of Van but your first body paragraph is about van Lake it is not related to introduction.again you mentioned Van in the second body paragraph later you mentioned again Van Lake I think it has not unity.your conclusion is very effective.Apart from these it has some spelling and grammar mistakes for example:
onother way/another
iz some part reaching 500 mt./which reaches 500 mt.in some parts.
it feels me refresh to my skin ad drinking a glass of water on a hot day.(it refreshes me as if I was drinking a glass of water on a hot day)
beatauty/beauty.
that is all my friend.ıf I see anything I will write them.see you:)
Dear Rızgar,
YanıtlaSilYour description of the city of Van makes me wonder about your beatiful city. Some corrections need to be made to improve this essay. Watch out my suggestions and rewrite this essay.
The place that (I)ı feel most comfortable is my hometown ,Van. Van is in (the)east(ern) part of TURKEY.It is known as Paris of eastern part of Anatolia ??in onother way
I calm down and feel better as ı watch Lake Van.The lake Van is the largest one in Turkey and (unique)navigable with its depth (in)iz some part(s) reaching 500 mt. When ı plunge into the lake(')s salt(y) water, it (makes me)feel??s me refresh to my skin a(n)(like) drinking a glass of water on a hot day.
Because of the beatauty of its surronding landscape (V)van has often been called ''Van for this world, faith for the next (one)''. Akdamar island, van castle, van cat, Lake Van and some bazaars are several (of the)most famous specials (of Van).
The Van lake (has)??is beautiful (in)blue colour, but unfortunately the salinity of the lake restrains agricultural devel(o)pment in the region.However,there are notable production of fruits and vegetables particularly north of the city.Ferryboats above the lake provide the railway connection between Tatvan andVan with Lake's amazing beauty.
Van is my most comfortable place mainly because of (its) sight, sound and the unique feel(ing)???everything mentioned in this essay.When (I)ı'm there ??ı feel totally relaxed as if ??ı were in my own little world. Most of all, van is my favorite place to be on the earth"
I liked your essay so much.Your introduction is really good, however, as Ayşen said there aren't unity in thesis stament and the first body paragraph.On the other hand, conclusion and descriptive objects are nice.
YanıtlaSilHi RIZGAR,
YanıtlaSilIntroduction can be longer.You should add a few sentences for background information.Your title is effective.There are grammatical mistakes as my friends and the teacher has mentioned before.Anyway,it is ok.see you.
dear ızgar
YanıtlaSilFirst of all: thank you for giving us a change to know your beatiful town.when itcomesto your writing itis good.you have unity,coherence and transitions but youcan still improve your essay